australiansanta:

“what the hell is Denny’s”

“what the hell is ihop”

I swear to god

husk-ie:

sociallyawkwardjocelyn:

fnark-oreo:

thankyouforthedildos:

Whenever I’m not alone in a public bathroom I will wait until the other person flushes then pee as fast I can so they wont hear it.

i wait until its dead silent like when they’re fixing their hair and i take the hardiest piss and as i exit the stall i stare them in the face so they know my dominance over the bathroom

Two different types of people in this world

i choked because i was laughing so hard omg

winchesterwolves:

moniker-padacklyte:

zillystring:

wasereborworthit:

mellowminty:

pizzaforpresident:

petition to rename the usa ‘south canada’

what about alaska

are we then normal canada

canada a bit to the left

What about South America? Is that just America? Or South South Canada?

hotwhiteguy:

blackmanspenis:

methlabrador:

what if one day for 24 hours everyone with a tumblr turned into whatever their url is 

fuck

finally

outbox:

inbox:

I want to marry whoever has the url outbox

I’m down 

lithiumbarbiedoll:

Somebody send North Korea an edible arrangement.

thebitchpudding:

pokemonyewest:

When you separate it, it looks like 2 different pictures

but when it’s together

gotta keep an eye out for selener

thesmoshfangirl:

chinchillaghosts:

wivernryder:

chinchillaghosts:

heyfunnie:

why is bob short for robert

how does one get ‘billy’ out of ‘william’?

How in hell do you get “Dick” from “Richard”?

you ask him nicely

you ask him nicely